I am going to Page, Arizona again today.
This was not supposed to become a recurring feature of my life.
I was there Tuesday. I drove home Tuesday.
And today I am driving back.
Because I made a mistake.
Not a huge mistake.
I didn’t photograph the wrong house. I didn’t accidentally fly the drone into Glen Canyon Dam. I didn’t leave my camera sitting next to Abraham Lincoln’s hat.
I made a small mistake.
Unfortunately, it was a five-hour-commute mistake.
There should be a separate category for these.
Most small mistakes cost you five minutes.
You typed the wrong password.
You forgot the attachment.
You left the coffee on top of the car.
My mistake apparently comes with 310 miles of corrective action.
And the worst part is there’s nobody to be mad at.
I would love to blame the client.
I would love to blame technology.
I’d even accept some complicated explanation involving solar flares and Adobe.
Nope.
Ben did it.
This is one of the great disadvantages of owning your own business.
When an employee screws something up, you can call them into your office and explain what they did wrong.
When you’re the employee, the manager and the owner, the disciplinary meeting is mostly just you sitting in the Prius thinking about what you’ve done.
I considered writing myself up.
But then I’d have to respond to it.
So I’m going back to Page.
At this point I’ve driven there often enough that I’m beginning to recognize things along the highway.
There’s that gas station.
There’s that weird rock.
There’s the exact location where I began reconsidering every decision that brought me here.
The first trip was an adventure.
There was Lake Powell.
Glen Canyon Dam.
The fourteen thousand stairs.
The pizza that required the Army Corps of Engineers.
Hotel waffles without instructions.
Abraham Lincoln’s hat.
Michael Jackson’s hat.
Three dead woodland animals playing poker.
Wile E. Coyote stuffed inside an ACME cannon.
It was a road trip.
Today I’m pretty sure it’s a commute.
That’s a significant psychological change.
Nobody says they’re taking a road trip to work.
There are no playlists.
There are no whimsical roadside stops.
You don’t pull over because a sign says WORLD’S LARGEST BALL OF TWINE – 17 MILES.
You say:
Not today, twine. I have made a mistake.
The good news is I’m staying in Kanab tonight instead of Page, which means I’ve apparently expanded my accidental employment territory into Utah.
At this rate I don’t need Google Maps anymore.
I need mail forwarding.
I don’t live in Page.
I apparently have visitation rights.
And somewhere in Arizona there is a very small photography mistake waiting patiently for me to drive five hours and fix it for all of 15 minutes.
I hope it appreciates the effort.
Yesterday’s Sports Mess
Yesterday went 1-1, with Houston doing exactly what we expected while Milwaukee lost 2-1 despite Logan Henderson giving us seven innings of excellent baseball. Hunter Brown gave Houston the starter advantage we wanted, while Luis Castillo supplied the vulnerability, and the Astros cashed comfortably. Milwaukee wasn’t a bad handicap so much as a baseball game in which Kevin Gausman happened to be better, so we’re not inventing a new rule because a reasonable -115 favorite lost. Sometimes the other guy pitches better. Baseball remains irritatingly legal.
THE GIANT SCOREBOARD
ALL SPORTS: 1,042-1,074-7
Recent journey:
1-8 → 4-0 → 0-3 → 1-2 → 1-2 → 1-2 → 2-1 → 3-1 → 1-3 → 2-1 → 1-2 → 1-1
Meanwhile:
TENNIS: 0-1
Untouched.
Protected.
Until today.
Today’s Picks
We’re keeping the baseball card clean with Rays ML -117 and Yankees ML -134, using consensus lines. Tampa gives us Nick Martinez against Kumar Rocker at a price that doesn’t require a permission slip, while the Yankees get Max Fried against Walker Buehler with enough starter advantage to make the number worthwhile. We looked elsewhere, but Milwaukee got too expensive and Cleveland’s second game requires the sort of later-in-the-day babysitting I can’t do while driving back to Arizona to correct my own photography mistake.
And then we’re doing something reckless.
Ben Shelton -1.5 sets -175.
Yes. Tennis.
The sacred 0-1 has been removed from the museum display and placed back into active service.
What could possibly go wrong?
This isn’t called Pick What I Pick.
It’s called Don’t Pick What I Pick.
Please wager accordingly.
